


Memories of A Life Once Lived

by hextrals



Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: M/M, Please be nice, i just really love grizz, i've never written for the society before
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2019-07-06
Packaged: 2020-06-23 14:24:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19703200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hextrals/pseuds/hextrals
Summary: Grizz has been thinking a lot about the past. One memory in particular has been eating at him. so, like any normal person he decides he needs to address the problem at it's root.





	Memories of A Life Once Lived

Grizz spent the majority of his time trying not to remember things. Trying not to remember West Ham, trying not to remember his parents- those things had become easy to forget. However some things, unlike others, were not as easy for Grizz to shove from his mind. Things like what he and Luke had done.

It had just been a kiss, really. Nothing spectacular or monumental. It was just a drunken kiss that wasn't supposed to mean anything but to Grizz it had meant so much. 

He had never kissed someone before that moment and the fact that his first kiss had been Luke had fucked with him. They’d never talked about it again but Grizz wanted to- he needed to. He’d hated himself for that kiss. Hated the fact that he  _ didn't  _ hate it.

What if it went wrong? What if Luke, his best friend, the only person who had been by his side consistently for years, decided that it was too much for him? What if he  _ loses his best friend? _ One way or another he had to talk to Luke about it. Had to clear the air even if his friend didn’t know there was air to be cleared.

He figured the easiest way to address the situation was to… text Luke about it. It wasn’t exactly like he could walk up to him and be like “hey so remember that time we got piss drunk and made out? Yeah well I do and I can’t stop thinking about it even though now Sam is around-”

Grizz shook himself out of his thoughts. He couldn’t bring up Sam. Not yet anyway. Grizz took a deep breath and grabbed his phone.  _ Well,  _ he thought,  _ rather sooner than later. _

  
  


_ Hey luke, can we talk? -Grizzly _

_ What’s up bro, smth wrong? -luka  _

_ No, nothing serious- not really anyway. Meet at mine in fifteen? -Grizzly _

_ Sure but dude you’re kinda freakin’ me out right now. -luka _

Grizz blew out a sharp breath. This wasn’t going to be easy to talk about. For the next fifteen minutes Grizz paced the floors of his now vacant home. Everything he wanted to talk to Luke about had happened before all of-  _ this. _ Before The Society and before Cassandra and Harry and Lexie and-

Loud knocking on his door snapped Grizz back to the present.

“It’s open, just- just come in.” He called, trying to ignore the amounts of dread pooling in his stomach.

“Yo, Grizz, what’s this about man? Is something happening with the Guard? Because I know I fucked up with the whole lying about Allie and Will thing and I-”

“No, Luke, slow down this isn’t- this has nothing to do with the Guard or Allie or this town it’s-” He swallowed his nerves. It was a lot harder to get out than he thought it was going to be. “It’s about something that happened between us in freshman year.”

Luke looked confused to say the least and frankly Grizz understood. They were graduated- well not technically but technically graduated. 

“Why’re you bringing up something from three years ago dude? Is it about Carla because I told you I was sorry-”

“ _ No! _ ” Grizz looked shocked at the firmness of his own voice. “This isn’t- this has nothing to do with anyone other than the two of us.” he said finally, sinking down onto the floor and resting his head on his knees. A very concerned look crossed Luke’s face.

“Grizz buddy, what’s going on?” he asked, sitting down in front of his best friend.

“Freshman year there was this- this party for- for football I guess. We both got absolutely trashed and we-”

“We kissed. More than kissed actually. I remember but why is this bothering you know? Are you g-” Luke stopped himself short when he saw the broken look that was on Grizz’s face.

“So what if I am?” Grizz asked in a small voice. He couldn’t look at Luke at this point. He was too scared. Suddenly a gentle hand was on his shoulder and he looked up to see Luke with a kind expression on his face.

“If you are that doesn’t change the fact that you’re Grizz. You’re my best friend, hell you’re practically my brother. I love you, man. Now what’s bothering you?”

Grizz could barely speak. He was pleasantly surprised at the response, so much so he nearly forgot the reason he wanted to talk to Luke in the first place. He pushed his hair back and sighed.

“That- that kiss has been haunting me for years, man. Seriously. Even though it was so long ago it still-”

“I get it, Grizz. Would you mind telling me why?” Luke asked softly. He was being patient, very conscious of how difficult this was for his friend.

“It was my first kiss.” Grizz mumbled, suddenly  _ very _ embarrassed. Luke’s eyes went wide as saucers. 

“Grizz, I-”

“It’s just been bugging me, y'know? The fact that not only was my first kiss with a boy it was with a  _ straight _ boy who, at the time, I was very much in love with.” Grizz felt all the blood drain from his face. Did. Did he just say that. Out loud?

“You were-” Luke started, eyebrows raised. 

“Yes. I was. Past tense. I got over it, don’t worry.” Grizz interrupted, keeping his eyes trained on the ground. He couldn’t believe he’d let that slip. He had sworn he would never confess to how he had felt and yet here he was, lost in his thoughts, in the middle of a spiral definitely about to breakdown-

Then Luke’s arms were crushing him in a tight hug. Grizz felt like he could cry. They were still friends. Luke knew about him, about who he was and how he had felt and he- he didn’t see him any different.

“Grizz, buddy, you are my best friend. No matter what, okay? You’re gay, so what? That doesn’t change the fact that you’re still the same kid I grew up with, alright. I’m always gonna be by your side.” 

Grizz was crying now. No maybe, he was crying. To think- he was going to have moved away and never spoken to Luke again and yet here they were still best friends. Luke moved away and smiled.

“So, is there anyone new who you’ve got your eye on?” He asked genuinely. Grizz blushed and ran a hand through his hair.

“There is this one guy…” he responded, barely able to contain his smile. Luke moved to sit next to his friend and slung an arm around his shoulder.

“Tell me about him.”


End file.
